A Little Help....

William's birthday is in a month and I need a little help deciding which toy to buy him. Here's the choices:

Wedgits 3-D Builders

Expand the building skills and creative development of children as young as 2 years with this 15-pc. preschool set. Its over-sized, geometrically symmetrical blocks stack, nest and/or interlock for free-form, 3-dimentional designs. Includes 46 design cards to get kids started. All in quality plastic. Largest block is 5¾" Sq. Ages 2 yrs. +.

2 'N 1 Wooden Workshop

It's a workbench---it's a tool box! Actually , this all wood set is both! Comes with pounding pegs, bolts, differently shaped screws, building slats along with a hammer, screwdriver and wrench to put it all together. The 13"L x 6"W x 6"H Workbench has pre-drilled holes for creative building. Ages 2 yrs. +.

I think the Wedgits are a little advanced for him right now, but he would still enjoy stacking them. The tools, I know would be a hit. The one draw back is the amount of pieces to keep up with. So, what would you get a two-year old boy?

My son....The Silly!

William mastered climbing out of the crib a couple weeks ago and I lowered the railing so he could get out easier. A couple nights ago I opened his door before going to bed and hit him on the head! He was sound asleep on the floor right by the door! He knows how to open his door, so I don't know what that was about. Well, today I heard some movement in his room, so after about 30 minutes or so I went to peek in on him and this is what I found....


Yep, he fell asleep UNDER his crib! Guess he was seeking a womb-like sleep environment or something.

To anonymous...

I'm not lost. I know where to go for the answers to my questions, so I'm not lost. Wandering maybe, but not lost. Nine years ago, God pulled me out of Egypt, and like the Israelites, I have been hesitant to enter the Promised Land out of fear. I see the giants and I think I must defeat them on my own instead of relying on God to fight the battles for me. A lot of my problem is how I think of God. I project my own ways of thinking and doing on to Him...I think He functions as I do, which is simply not true. So, I think my first step is to seek God's Word for who He is and allow the Holy Spirit to transform my thinking. In learning who God is, I should also become aware of who I am, since only He can really answer that for me.

On to another subject.......

Read this:

Imagine you are walking down a leafy path. It is early spring before sundown, around six P.M. The sun is receding, and you are walking alone, caressed by the breezy light of the late afternoon. Then, suddenly, you feel a large drop on your right arm. Is it raining? You look up. The sky is still deceptively sunny: only a handful of clouds linger here and there. Seconds later, another drop. Then, with the sun still perched in the sky, you are drenched in a shower of rain. This is how memories invade me, abruptly and unexpectedly: drenched, I am suddenly left alone again on the sunny path, with a memory of the rain.
--from Reading Lolita in Tehran by Aza Nafisi

This book is amazing...the author is amazing...you must read it!

While reading for class this week, I came across this passage from an essay on womens' relationships by Adrienne Rich:

It isn't that to have an honorable relationship with you, I have to understand everything, or tell you everything at once, or that I can know beforehand, everything I need to tell you.

It means that most of the time I am eager, longing for the possibility of telling you. That these possibilities may seem frightening, but not destructive, to me. That I feel strong enough to hear your tentative and groping words. That we both know we are trying, all the time, to extend the possibilities of truth between us.

The possibility of life between us.

I read this, and I think.....I want to feel this way in my relationships with my husband, my children, my family, my friends. I want to be "eager, longing for the possibility of telling" my secrets, my dreams with those I say I love the most. I want to be able to trust someone with me, just me; not the me I put on every morning, but the me I shove underneath in order to protect. No one really knows me except for God...I don't even think I know me.

I am almost 30, but in many ways I still feel like I did at 16...unsure of who I am, of what I am supposed to be doing, of what I really believe in. I see people, talk to people and I can tell they really, I mean really, trust God. A couple weeks ago in church we sang the song "Blessed Be the Name of the Lord", and it seems every time we sing it a man who lost his 9-year old daughter is up there on stage playing guitar. I look at him as we sing, "You give and take away, still my heart will choose to say, blessed be the name of the Lord", and I think, could I see this song if God allowed one of my children to die so young? Would I trust Him? I want to trust Him like that. Yet, I know learning to trust requires handing over control, a risk all too often I am not willing to take.

In a way, I see the above passage as the cry of my soul to God, when I allow her to speak freely; although, God's voice is certainly not tentative or groping. I don't have to understand everything about Him, or need to tell Him everything (He already knows it all). I am eager to tell Him, though I don't always know what. The possibility of intimacy with Him does seem frightening to me, but in no way do I see Him as destructive, though He seeks to break down the walls I build between Him and I. He is, even when I am not, " trying, all the time, to extend the possibilities of truth between us. The possibility of life between us."

Apparently, we have monsters in our house. These monsters do anything from break the toothbrush holder to drawing on the toilet and bathtub (at least they used a pencil). They also make messes in rooms and spill milk all over the table. Since, I cannot see them, I assume they are invisible or maybe you just have to be three years old before they will reveal themselves to you.

So, any suggestions on teaching the concept of "telling the truth" to an almost four year old?

This could have been worded better:

From this article in the Dallas Morning News

"Texas has made less headway in reducing teen births than the nation as a whole, according to data in the Annie E. Casey Foundation's annual Kids Count report to be released today."

Don't you need to prevent the pregnancy before you can prevent the birth?

Here's some of the books I am thinking about for this summer:

Infidel and A Caged Virgin by Ayaan Hirsi Ali

The Fall of the Evangelical Nation by Christine Wicker (read an editorial in the Sunday paper that sparked my interest)

The Body Project by Joan Jacobs Brumberg ( I actually read this about 3 years ago, but I want to read it again)

Without a Map by Meredith Hall

I think I am going to need more hours in my day....

I am required to read four complete non-fiction works in two genres, i.e. biography, memoir, current events, history, or literary journalism, over the course of the next 10 weeks (500 word summaries required). In addition to those, I must read two other books, Three Cups of Tea and one other on women, globalization and culture (comparative book review required), and there's the essay book and the textbook to read also. All of these also require discussion board participation. It's a good thing I finally trained Kayleigh to play quietly in her room while the others are taking naps; she even falls asleep half the time. I am choosing the reading track for this course; there is a writing and a conference track available, but I think the reading one fits my taste right now. I wouldn't mind trying my hand at writing creative non-fiction sometime in the future; it appeals to my editorial writer aspiration. My exposure to the genre is very limited, so I am looking forward to reading more of it this summer.

Anyone have suggestions on what four books I should read? I was thinking of reading two memoirs and two works of literary journalism. I don't get out much, so I have no idea of what's out there.

Eureka!!

I think I have found the trick to get Kayleigh to stop sucking her fingers! JellyBeans! I set a time frame, say 30 minutes, and if she doesn't suck fingers during that time frame, she gets a JellyBean. I also enroll her friends to tattle on her (I know, it's mean, oh well).

Something I am not looking forward to....taking the pacifier away from William. I should have listened to all the baby books that tell you take it away before 6 months of age. He is only allowed to have it if he is in bed, so it should be a little easier, but this is not going to be fun!

Something I am looking forward to.....my summer class, Literary Non-fiction. From glancing at the required books, this looks to be a pretty fun course!

Well, kids are climbing the walls...literally!

Stacation

Since Saturday we've been practicing for what it'll be like when we're empty nesters. Or at the minimum have kids old enough to supervise themselves to some extent. Our kiddos have been at grandparents since then (1/2 with mine, 1/2 with Michelle's), and we'll get them back Thursday.

Now, don't get me wrong, I've been tempted to drop in on them to see them and hang out, but it has been wonderful being able to get a lot of stuff done around the house that is difficult with the two little ones. That and Michelle is able to help out rather than constantly being hounded by kids. We've painted the kitchen and foyer, finished painting a lot of door trim, prepped The Boy's room for painting, and prepped the living room. We've also done a massive spring cleaning effort and took a carload of stuff to CCA. And I put in a new garage door opener.

This is our vacation. I actually read a term that calls it a Stacation (Stay at Home Vacation) Yeah, doesn't sound "fun" does it. But, I actually do feel good because we've gotten a lot of stuff done that I've been wanting to get done and it feels good to have it completed. But it's not all work and no play. We've had "date night" every night of the week. We've seen 2 movies in the theater and it's been probably 6 months to a year since we've gotten to do that. And Michelle got a hottie mom haircut.

We were going to go on a cruise for our vacation, but ended up needing to cancel. Then we were going to rent a condo on the beach for a few days, but felt that the money there would be better spent doing these things around the house. We also got a new mattress a couple weeks ago when we decided we weren't going anywhere. But, since I still had grandparent's lined up to watch the kids, I wasn't going to let them off the hook that easy. Hence the empty house right now.

Alright, the day is starting. I've got 6 doors to rout and hang and then I've got to get my garage cleaned back up from being the workspace to park vehicles back in again.

Woo Hoo!! Final project for the Women's Studies course is complete and submitted! I am so glad to be done with that course. Not that it wasn't interesting or eye-opening in many cases, but it's nice to be finished with school for a month or so.

In other news....

It's official, we will be Sonlighters for at least the next year or three! I am excited about starting this curriculum with Kayleigh and the other kiddos I watch. I think a little more structure to their day will help with the bickering that has started happening daily. They seem to get tired of each other sooner than they used to, plus Kayleigh loves "doing school". Sonlight is literature based, so I'll pretty much be reading stories to them all year and adding phonics and math where appropriate. I have three different levels to teach to, so it should be interesting. There's Kayleigh who can read any three to four letter word with a short vowel sounds. Then there are two who are ready to learn letter sounds and beginning words. And then there's William who just needs to be introduced to the alphabet and numbers. All this curriculum planning makes me think about opening a preschool...but I really don't want all the business hassles of that!

The idea of homeschooling it still pretty scary to me. I worry that somehow I am going to mess up their education by not teaching something correctly. Then I worry that they will have social dysfunctions. But I really feel homeschooling is the best thing for them right now....we are taking it one year at a time, one kid a time.

Guess who this is......

PS: a certain someone named Nathan should have a good idea!

Somebody Got Herself a New Grill

You read that pronoun right. Michelle made me give in an go buy a new grill. I so frugal/stingy/cheap (pick your adjective) that I've been wanting one but never could bring myself to pull the trigger on it. But Michelle wanted to have more grilled meals and since my old one was such a piece of junk, they never turned out right.

Since today was gorgeous and we had been cooped up inside most of the day priming our master bathroom for painting (pictures to follow), it was a great opportunity to eat outside. I suppose next I need some real outdoor furniture.

A few months ago my mom came back from my Granny's with a bag of yarn...this is the first finished project from that bag. The pattern was for infants, but I did some tweaking that actually worked and it fits the girl. I'm not sure how Daddy is going to feel about the open back, but I think it will be cute even with a tank top underneath.

I have never quite understood how such little people can make so much noise! Right now I feel like I am in an elevator with a 12 piece brass band! I can't wait for lunch because when their mouths are full of food there is a brief moment of silence! Usually the chaos doesn't bother me, but today it's about to drive me nuts!

SNOW!!!

Amazing Finds

#1--I am not what one would call a "natural" teacher...my mother-in-law is and I am totally amazed at how she turns almost everything into some kind of learning experience. I wish I had that gift, but since I do not, I like to surf the net for free resources. A couple days ago I came across this website: Hubbard's Cupboard. I haven't had the chance to look at all of it, but what I have seen looks pretty cool. She has a whole list of Bible verses set to song for memorization that I might have to use for myself! I am thinking of using the 4's curriculum with Kayleigh next year; it seems like something she would enjoy.

#2--This past Sunday I picked up a book from the church library(check it out if haven't lately), Choices by Mary Farrar, wife to Steve Farrar. I was totally captured by these words in the Intro:

"As the struggle (internal) continued, I felt a sense of--dare I say it--futility creeping into my life. It wasn't that I minded doing the laundry or cleaning the mildew out of the shower. But I was discovering something I didn't expect. Isolated from the outside world and enveloped in the daily demands of caring for a home, I was finding the gap between the home and the outside world to be far greater than I had ever imagined."

This is exactly the struggle I have been feeling for quite some time, but couldn't put my finger on what words to describe it. The first few chapters explain how the make-up of the home has change drastically over the last 150 years or so. The word "work" used to describe what a woman does daily within her home: raising and educating her children, keeping house, sewing, cooking, etc. Now "work" is something you do outside of the home...think about it, we call women who choose to stay at home "stay-at-home" moms, like all they do is sit around the house all day., instead of describing the as "work-at-home" moms. The modern feminist movement grew out of women losing their sense of value and importance as the makers and keepers of the home. I have not finished the book, but I'll let you know my final thoughts when I do.

Well , I have work to do...talk at ya later.

****Bragging Wife Alert****

I was thinking this morning that I brag about my children way more than I do about my husband. It's so easy to let the kids take the focus of my life simply because they have the bulk of my time and attention right now. Justin was around before they came along and will hopefully be with me much longer than they will., so I spent the morning thinking about all the reasons I am proud of him. I think when you live with someone day in and day out you tend to get focused on everything that drives you batty about them. Taking time to list what you admire about them really changes your perspective. So, in no particular order:

• He is an amazing financial planner and we rarely have any debt; which in this society says a lot.
• He cares about providing a stable present and future for me and the kiddos, and therefore, works hard at what he does.
• The line of work he is in generally requires a college degree, but he's so intelligent that he can do it without one.
• Just because he has a good job without having a degree, doesn't mean he isn't diligently working towards one.
• Somehow he balances work, family, church, school and all his other responsibilities without going crazy.
• He is supportive of my desire to stay home with the kiddos, even though me going to work would relieve some of the stress he feels about providing for us.
• He is an awesome servant...if someone has a need and he can fill it, he's there. That's why he served as a preschool Sunday School coordinator for about two and a half years despite the fact that he really doesn't like small children (unless they belong to him, even then it's questionable).
  
• I am not the easiest person to live with, but he is patient with me and doesn't let on that I annoy him too much.

There's more, but my mind is having a hard time putting them into words.

This semester I am taking an introductory Women's Studies course, and while I am learning many facts I did not know previously, there are some facts I would rather not be aware of. For instance, while researching information on abortion for a reading response I came across this number....857,475. That's the total number of abortions reported for 2000. What I find even more disturbing is this number 1.4%, the percentage of abortions performed after 21 weeks gestation. Now 1.4% sounds like a small number, but 1.4% of 857.475 is 12, 004. Now does that number seem small? Most abortion supporters make themselves feel better because of this number: 87%--the percentage of abortion performed before 13 weeks. They rationalize, saying that the fetus isn't really a human being. Well, when I was pregnant with William, I had sonograms about every 3 weeks starting at 6 weeks gestation. I saw his heart beat when his little body was only 4 weeks old...now tell me, how is that not proof of his humanity.

Please do not misunderstand me...I am a realistic person who understands not everyone shares my believe on when life begins, so I do not believe abortion should be made illegal. I do believe, however, the procedure needs to be more controlled. Too many women see abortion as a means of birth control. I know one women in particular who had 9 before she was 27 years old. And it is obvious to me that if at least 857,475 unintended pregnancies occurred, women are seriously in the dark in regards to how their bodies and reproductive systems work. And don't get me started on the "safe sex" education debate...apparently women aren't listening.

Enough of my soap box...I'll get down now.

***Another Bragging Parent Alert***

So William doesn't feel left out.....I was beginning to wonder when this child would ever begin to speak, but in the last week he has started using about 10 words regularly. I think he knew how to say them all along and was just waiting until he had good reason to use them.

Here's his vocabulary:

"Mama"--finally!
"Ball"
"Door"
"Book"
"Drink"
"Bath"
"Down"
"Baby"
"Baba"--his pacifier
"Night-night"

While looking through some pictures, I found this one. I miss her little baby curls!

**Bragging Parent Alert**

Kayleigh was coloring yesterday and yelled out, "Mommy I wrote my name!". I, of course, blew it off thinking she had done her usually scribbling that she calls writing. Well, when I walked over to look at her paper this is what I saw:



Starting with the pink "K" is a pretty recognizable "Kaylei" followed by a scribble and an "h". Of course the "a" is backwards, but that's totally normal for a three-year old. I have not begun instructing her on handwriting, but I am beginning to think I might need to before she develops incorrect writing techniques. Right now we are concentrating on phonics and basic math with a little art and science thrown in. I was worried that I was beginning to school her too early, but she actually requests to "do school" on a regular basis, so I don't think I am rushing her into it.

So nuch to do, so Few Resources

Economics was defined to me as how to allocate scarce resources to the consumption or creation of goods and services.

I have plenty of goods I would like to consume, but not enough resources (defined for me as time and money).

An economics lesson sounds kind of odd for a post, but the topic is: home improvement

I have a massive list of things I would like to do to the house to update it and, in some instances, upgrade it. Mostly, though, it's updating which is unfortunately a necessity in order to maintain market value. I always have one foot out the door and want to make sure I can maximize my return of equity if I had to sell my house due to some catastrophic or unexpected event.

My list:

1. Replace 6 windows and a sliding door.
2. Add some more insulation to the attic.
3. Outside A/C compressor (I'm the kind of guy who would spend $4,000 to save $50 a month)
4. Replace carpet with wood or laminate flooring.
5. Replace the Living Room ceiling fan.
6. Purchase and install fans in the dining (soon to be study/den), master bathroom, and kitchen.
   
7. Closet organization for master closet
8. Paint: kitchen, living, breakfast, hallway, master bath, and Wm's room
9. Add skylights to the living room. It doesn't get any direct light.
10. Replace smooth front doors with 6 panel
11. Paint all the door trim white instead of definitely-dated-woody-brown.
12. Crown moulding
13. Captain's beds with built in drawers for the kids (not so much a home improvement as a furniture improvement)
14. Re-stain cabinets in kids bath, master bath, and kitchen
15. Texture walls in kitchen and master bath

I think that covers most of it. I'm probably missing some, but my wallet hurts already after typing that list. My number 1 is probably doing the door trim and painting rooms. That, more than any other, will make the most difference in the feel of the house.

So, what are some of everyone else's highest desire/priority projects around the house?
Of my list, what would anybody recommend I do first? (Tara, if you read this you can't answer since you're already telling me these things :) )

Another shameless advertisement....

I am selling some of my pre-fold cloth diapers and covers in the hopes I can raise enough capital to switch to Fuzzi Bunz for Mr. William. If you know anyone in the market please send them my way! Right now I have everything listed on Baby Cotton Bottoms Bargain Basement.

Ad Titles are:

"Huge lot of DSQ White Pre-folds"
"Bumkins Diaper Covers"
"Alexis Feather-lite Pull-Ons"
"6 Small Snugglebottoms"

Sadly, I have been using disposable full-time since September because prefolds were just too hard to use with 6 kiddos running around. Plus, they just don't make clothes that fit over bulky diapers anymore. I am feeling guilty about all the diapers I am putting in the trash!

I'm so excited! Justin took me to Barnes and Noble for my birthday, where I promptly searched out the knitting and crochet sections and picked out the above. I am in love with this book! And since I don't have any babies to make gifts for, my first project from this book will be an awesome cardigan for ME!!!

I think Kayleigh has watched The Little Mermaid a little too much...she's in the other room coloring and singing "Part of that World". It's cute.

Shameless Advertising

If anybody knows someone looking to buy a nice used dining set and hutch, or a coffee table and end table send me a note and I'll give you details.

Michelle came up with a new arrangement for our couch and loveseat that makes it a little better for conversating when all seats are taken up and for also watching tv from all seats. But, the caveat is that our rectangular-ish coffee table doesn't work so well. She wants a round ottoman for putting tired feet up for maximum comfort. She also doesn't like the current table because her legs are too short to reach. I, on the other hand, have no problems :)

The dining set we just don't use. I have persuaded Michelle of the merits of having an office/billpaying/study/schoolwork/me work from home space in the house. I personally hate formal dining rooms. With several exceptions, I believe it is a waste of space. Very few people really utilize the space enough to justify it's existence. So Michelle agreed that we can convert it. So we're trying to sell the furniture pieces to raise capital for the conversion.

I already have a reasonable computer hutch from Ikea that I plan to reuse, but it'll be nice to get some shelves, maybe a nice chair and lamp, and a ceiling fan. She likes the idea of shelves to have a library. If I could afford it, she would have me build her wall to wall shelves and fill it with books in a heartbeat. Her long-term goal, when the bulk of child-rearing is done, is to get a master's in Library Sciences and become a librarian. I'm ok with that, because then I'll have my own hot little librarian to brag about!

Well, time to finish cleaning house so I don't have it hanging over my head on my day off for MLK. My aim this whole day has been to do the domestic stuff so Michelle was able to have a lazy birthday. I think I did ok, but I know it could have been better.

Today is a movie day....the kids just seem to be in a bad mood, so I'm giving them some rest time while they watch Jonah. Maybe I'm the one in a bad mood and that just makes the kids seem worse; either way, I'm giving myself a break right now.

Today I feel tired. Just plain tired. Tired of being a mom, of being a wife, of watching other people's children, of going to school, of housework ( not that I do a whole lot, Justin helps me bunches in this department). I'm not depressed, it's probably just hormonal. What I really want is a vacation by myself....is that a bad thing? Just a couple days to just be by myself...to read a good book, work on some crochet projects, focus on Christ without time constraints or interruptions. I still haven't figured out how to juggle the whole being a wife, mother and pursuer of Christ dynamic. It seems earthly things fill up my time leaving no room for the spiritual. Of course this is probably why I feel tired...no spiritual food, or at least very little of it.

Last night I took a step to put more spiritual food into my soul. I went to a Bible study for the first time in three years. Justin and I do attend a minichurch, but they are all in the same boat we are...too much to do, with too little time to do it in...so we do not usually do indepth Bible studies, which is totally fine. This Bible Study is a women's group and we are going through James! I'm the youngest by about 10-15 years; in fact, I'm the age of most of the other women's children. I think my job this Spring will be just to sit back and take in all the wisdom I can from these women. I am so excited!

Well, I need to pay attention to my very busy, into everything, opening doors already son!

What Justin did with his time off...along with painting the playroom and staining cabinets to install in there for storage (my Christmas present)! I can't wait to store all the toys and craft stuff in one place.

I bought him this for his birthday, I'm such an awesome wife!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

Playing in the Leaves!

Blogging has been on the back burner for a little while. I had a paper to write...I loathe writing papers unless I am actually interested in the topic. I also started a blog dedicated to my crochet habit/addiction...Yarn is My Addiction. That is where you can find pics of the my finished projects. Warning....if you are a friend of mine having a baby, you might see pics of your shower gift...just act surprised when you get it! I am not quite to the point of developing my own patterns, but maybe in the future you'll find some original creations there.

Thought this was too cute not to share!

It's official, my name is Michelle and I am a Ravelry addict!

Ravelry is like mySpace for knitters and crocheters, and it's AWESOME! I will probably now spend way too much time looking for new patterns to try out. My goal this next year it to learn to knit so I can have tons more patterns to choose from! Right now the site is still in beta form, so if you are interested in joining you have to get on their waiting list. I put my name on about a month ago and received my invite over the weekend, so it doesn't take long to become a member and it is so worth the wait!

I just finished a blanket for a new baby and am starting another for yet another new baby coming! Women I know need to stop having babies so I can work on the afghan I started for Kayleigh two years ago. I love having an excuse to try out a new pattern, so I really don't mind all the little ones on the way.

Kiddos are great! William is climbing on anything you can think of, including using the chairs to get on top of the breakfast room table. Kayleigh is amazing us with her ability to memorize just about anything Stars Wars related.

Little Elmo

Little Princess

Papa teaching the Little Princess how to putt!

Isn't he handsome!

This picture is for you, Ame! Thought you would like to see the little nature girl in action. She found this caterpillar and literally laid on the deck for 10 minutes trying to get it on her finger. She was so proud of herself when she finally succeeded!

Aaaarrrrggggh!

Ever have those days at work where you just want to say "to heck with it all" and give up? And, knowing where we ultimately end up, realizing that everything here really doesn't matter so why bother. But then coming full circle and realizing it would be really dumb because even though our time here is short, we're still here. And we still have to survive. And, in my case, provide for 3 others. Funny how as I get older (dare I say more mature) I recognize that, in the Divine scheme of things, people and relationships will be more valuable than making sure I have a comfortable retirement. Don't get me wrong, I believe it's wise to save and prepare for not being able to work or not wanting to work all the time, but really all I need is enough to pay the bills and maybe have some left over. That thought is refreshing.

I'm thinking about getting one of these...



It's called a Smart car (www.usa.smart.com), built by DaimlerChrysler. They've been selling these in Europe since 1998 and have sold about 770,000. The main structure is very crash worthy, and the car itself is quite comfortable. They're doing a tour of the US to promote the launch in the first quarter of 2008, and Michelle and I went to see them at the Dart Rail station on Mockingbird and 75 Saturday.

Now, for all you nay-saying, SUV-because-they're-"safer", worry wart types these are very safe cars. Now, I have no illusion that if I got hit by a semi or a Suburban head-on at 50 mph that my wife will get a big payout and perhaps an opportunity to upgrade husbands, but...considering I commuted to work on a motorcycle for over a year 3-4 days a week, I'd say the safety concern is less than previous.

Also, 40-50 mpg for $13,000 is pretty darn good. To get that kind of city economy, I'd need a VW Jetta Diesel ($26,000 entry fee), or a Hybrid ($22,000 entry fee). I'm not sold on hybrid technology. I have a whole 'nother rant on that. Namely that they're building cars consumers don't want. You can't force a Tahoe driver into a Prius. So instead of focusing on small cars, focus on improving the economy of the vehicles people buy. A passenger diesel is an immediate 20% economy difference and is proven technology. Off my soapbox.

Plus, I got a thing for quirky different cars. I like minivans and hatchbacks and wagons and such. I'm not a Euro wannabe hippie treehugger, to be clear. But I am a tightfisted, penny penching, stingy, money-Nazi that wants to spend as little per month on a necessity and this is a great way to do it. No, I'm not riding a bicycle 16 miles one way to work, either. Also, this thing is 8.8 feet long. Parking is a breeze and it would take up very little space in my garage, leaving more room for all the other accoutrement's that take up space in a garage. It's only $99 to reserve one. I'm still kicking the idea around. As a pure commuter, it would be fantastic.

For the 3 people that read our blog, thoughts?

Today I am wondering if I am overly cautious or just realistic about the world we live in. For example, yesterday, while in line at Target, the man behind me began commenting an how cute Kayleigh was and asking questions like, has she ever been to Disney World, and noticing juice in my cart, is she a juice lover. He also noticed the shirts I had in my cart for William and asked if she was my oldest. I, of course, was vague in every answer to this questions because it kind of struck me as strange. If a woman asked those questions, I probably wouldn't think twice about answering them; but a man interested in my children puts me in protection mode. He was probably just a nice guy trying to make conversation in the long line, but I was uncomfortable. So, I wonder have all the stories on child predators made me too cautious/suspicious of people or is it better to error on the side of caution in this case?

Okay, so I thought on the whole "What gets me excited" question...

Intellectual excitement:

Solving math problems--I know I'm a dork!
Watching a crochet project begin to take shape--I'll post a pic of the blanket I just finished later.
My children finally getting something I have taught them.
Making gifts /figuring out the perfect gift to buy for someone

Activities:

Softball--haven't played in a while because I just can't get into the co-ed thing. If you aren't playing to win, it's just not the same!

Board Games--well, except Monopoly

Shopping--unfortunately this is more fun when you have money to spend and we are not millionaires!

Does reading count as an activity?

I know this isn't a really long list...maybe I'm just not an exciting person! No really, my idea of a vacation is a beach, a chair, and all of Jane Austen's novels. Throw in the movies based on her novels with an unlimited supply of yarn and I'm the happiest woman alive. Does this make me dull?

It's a Two Way Street

In Michelle's previous blog, she commented about things that gets someone excited or passionate. In the comments, Brent turned the tables on me for mine. I'm going to break it up into thought and action (with a few that overlap)

Thought:
Service
Efficiency - i.e. planning errands for least amount of driving/time usage. Stuff like that.
Risk analysis
Common sense - although I'm guilty of not using it at times.
Sucking it up - again, guilty of whining on occasion.
Proper grammar and spelling - petty, I know, but it irritates me.
Trivia

Activities:
Service
Physical activity - sand volleyball, skiing-water and snow, motorcycling, Sea-Doos with my friend Jeff, Bocce Ball, water parks, weightlifting(a little lacking on that of late). Pretty much anything that's not sitting still.
Computer games - the nerd in me can't be contained
Bridge- old person game, so I fit in. It is a lot of fun.

I'm sure there are some others. If anybody has made observations about things they think I've appeared passionate/excited about, let me know so I can update my list.

Justin.

While watching Good Morning America this morning I saw a commercial for Monopoly with electronic banking. At first, I thought, "What a neat idea", then I thought, "Wait, half the fun of Monopoly is fighting over who gets to be the banker!" Growing up I really wasn't a fan of the game, but if I was the banker, I loved it! There is just something about counting out all that "money" and making change for people. Needless to say, I do not plan to purchase this new Monoploy!

Lately, I have been thinking about a question Justin keeps asking me: "What makes you excited? What is your passion?" The sad thing is, I really don't know. There are many things I like and enjoy doing, but nothing sticks out above them all. Well, there is one thing that really irks me....lies, especially those that lead young people astray. So, I guess I have a passion for the truth, most importantly the truth about the freedom Christ gives us from sin. Last Friday, 20/20 did a segment on homosexuality that had me yelling at the TV. It really irritates me when the media tells people struggling with this that they have no choice but to give over to the feelings. I think what bothers me most is the thought that some teenager was watching this program and has now decided to live this lifestyle because some biased news program told him he would be unfulfilled in life if he didn't. GRRRRRRRRR!

A couple months ago, Justin and I noticed one of Kayleigh's eyes would wander when she focused on you from a distance. We thought maybe she had discovered how to cross one eye, so we waited to see if it continued. Well, the wandering eye kept wandering and it even became more noticeable, therefore we made an appointment with the optometrist. Turns out she needs glasses and her prescription is +4. I think she looks pretty darn cute in her new eyewear!

Today is a slow day, finally! With school starting and childcare back to normal, I haven't found much time to blog. All my one-year olds have dropped morning naps and Kayleigh hasn't taken an afternoon nap for the last two weeks. I was hoping she would go back to taking her naps, but I don't see it happening. After about a week, I gave up trying to make her sleep and decided if she's going to be awake she might as well learn something; so, we started The Ordinary Parent's Guide to Teaching Reading on Tuesday. I was a little hesitant to start her at three, but she seems to be enjoying it. Next week I think I will try adding some math games to our "school" time.

Well, the video I put on for the kids is over and I have to go start lunch!

When I am asked if I work or stay at home, my answer is yes! I don't have this many everyday of the week....that would be three 1 -year olds, a 2 -year old and two 3- year olds. My days are busy and sometimes a little crazy, but it's fun; well most of the time it is. Naptime is still my favorite time of the day and lunchtime my least. The three oldest entertain themselves fairly well, although I do have to referee on occasion. I thought I was going to be able to begin preschool with the 3-year olds, but I haven't quite worked out when. Right now I send them outside for 30 minutes a day in the morning and then they watch a short video while I work on lunch. I'm not stressing over structured learning time right now. Maybe when it rains or is too cold to play outside we will do a little craft or something.

Finally broke down and gave the boy a haircut. He had a mullet thing going, so it was about time!

Isn't this the most pitiful face ever?

So, as Justin said, I was a single mom for almost two weeks...I don't know how single moms survive, especially those without any family support around. I am lucky enough to have both sets of grandparents and my sister nearby, so it wasn't too bad.

Made an "A" in my English class and received 48 out of 5o points on the final paper! I'm pretty proud of myself on that account, seeing as I wrote most of the paper with two babies crawling around at my feet. Only 42 hours left...two more English, one sociology and the rest are math!

My ten-year high school reunion is coming up in October...yikes! Not exactly excited, but I am looking forward to seeing a few folks. I am still amazed that I somehow manage not to run into anyone from high school more often. It's hard to believe that high school was ten years ago...feels like more from my perspective. It was at the beginning of my senior year that I made a misguided decision that took me down a road I'd rather forget. Suffice it to say, that year and the two that followed were pretty crappy. Now, looking back I don't even recognize the girl in my memory as me. Paul wrote in the book of Romans that when men turn their backs on him, he gives them over to a depraved mind...well, it's true. I often wonder why I was allowed to go down that road. I hear stories from people about God keeping them from making stupid decisions and think, "Why didn't he protect me?" He probably tried and I just didn't pay attention. I think the main thing God has taught me from that episode is compassion. People do stupid things and I think, sometimes, Christians are the last people to offer grace, when they should be the first. It is easy to look at the actions of a person and make judgment, but you cannot know what circumstances brought about the actions just from looking at a person. That is not to say circumstances justify sin, but they can explain it to some degree. Whenever judgmental thoughts come to mind, I think of Jesus's Sermon on the Mount. There are no "degrees" of sin with Him; you lust, you commit adultery; you hate, you murder. The attitude behind all of them is the same. I wish more Christians would get this.

To Sea, or Not to Sea,that is the question.

Well, 7 years in the making and I think I'm finally going to get to make up to Michelle a "real" honeymoon. See, our first one was done on a shoestring budget of less than $500 I think. That's what happens when you get married too young, I guess. I should have listened to the wisdom of Brent when I first got married and taken on some debt to splurge on our honeymoon.

So, 7 years later I have enough choice to actually spend money on a vacation, and a real one. So now our dilemma is what to do. We're thinking of a cruise with some dear friends, The Rutschmans. I hear cruises are a fabulous value for what you get. I've also heard it's more fun with friends because it's nice to be able to do things with other people you know, yet you still have the ability to just be a pair.

We're also kicking around getting a condo on the beach in/around Gulf Shores Alabama. See, this is where I'm learning from the past. I am actually listening to Brent who can't shut up enough, er, heap enough praises on the greatness that is Gulf Shores. I'm looking at some pictures and it does look pretty gorgeous. I'm also a fan of keeping my tourist dollars in the local economies. Yes, I'm sure Europe is wonderful and all, but there is so much to see and do in MY country that I want to see and do those things first. Then, I'll consider overseas. I'm very much a patriot when it comes to that.

So, the question for anybody that actually reads this, is what else to consider? Ideally I'd like to be able to drive to save money on a plane ticket unless said plane ticket is available for less than $200 per person. Any suggestions?

Whirlwind Summer (at least for me)

This has been quite a busy summer session for me. Week in San Deigo for work in May, week off the July 4th holiday in Austin and a trip to Sea World, and then I just got back Friday from a 7 day canoe/camping trip in the Boundary Waters Canoe Area that spans the Minnesota/Canada border. I'm done with vacation until May of next year when hopefully Michelle and I will go on a cruise with our friends The Rutschmans.

Re: Canoe Trip - Talk about gorgeous country. We made base camp on an island in the middle of a lake, and then took a couple day trips to other lakes nearby. Fishing every day, catching 3-4 without a lot of effort. Paddling out 150 yards from shore to get water straight out of the lake; it's that clean. Swimming in shoulder deep water and still being able to see my feet. Watching the bald eagle's eat the fish guts we left on the opposite shore. Overall just enjoy the majesty of this created world. I really have a hard time believing all of this is a great cosmic chance, and places like the BWCA just reinforce that.

The trip was exhausting but wonderful. The last day was very eventful. Let's just say high winds and novice canoeists equal involuntary swims: three times. It's a better story in person, though. I'll hope to go again next year if Michelle let's me (while I was gallavanting in the wilderness she was a single mom for one and a half weeks).

School work is keeping me pretty busy lately. I feel like all my free time is spent reading or researching for the British Literature course I am taking. So far, I am enjoying the class....my only complaint is they seem to pick the most depressing literature to study! This is our last week on Tess of the D`Ubervilles by Thomas Hardy and his view on life was anything but hopeful. Don't get me wrong, this is an amazing book and I loved reading it, but, man, am I ready to read something a little more optimistic. Not to mention, Hardy was agnostic, or at least skeptical in regards to the goodness of God. He seems to think God is up there just messing around with our lives for his own amusement. This course seems to focus on authors who feel belief in God is something for children and not for thinking adults. To me, their beliefs about God seem to be the childish ones...or at least lacking in understanding....it's irritating to say the least. Can't wait for next semester when I have to take a Women's Studies course!

KAYLEIGH IS THREE!!!!!!

Thursday was her actual birthday, but we had a family party for her yesterday! Ame made that beautiful butterfly cake for her...isn't it just the cutest! Insects were the theme of the day, since she received all the Hermie character dolls and three new videos from Granny, Papa and Aunt Samantha. Last night she slept with Lucy (her specific request when asked what she wanted for her birthday); I wonder who she will pick tonight.

We had a wonderful vacation week! Saturday through Tuesday evening we were in Austin visiting dear friends William and Sammi. Monday we met Justin's brother and his family for a day at Sea World. This was my first time to go! The Shamu show is so awesome! Kayleigh rode her first roller coaster and Daddy bought her a huge Shamu to take home. Wednesday Aunt Samantha and I took her to see the fireworks show at Vista Ridge (her first). I was a little worried the noise would bother her, but come to find out they shoot them off further away than they used to. When I was growing up, they went off right over our heads and debris fell all around us!

I have a new appreciation for mothers of multiples. Two days this week I had triplets! William's little girlfriends came over to play and was I ever busy! Until nap-time (thank goodness all of them take the afternoon one together), I felt like I was constantly feeding or changing a diaper. Poor Kayleigh is probably feeling really neglected :(

I have started doing "school" for about an hour a day this week, and it seems to help some. This week we learned about the letter A. We made an alligator paper bag puppet, a letter A book, and an apple tree with fingerprint apples. I am also working on one-to-one correspondence and shapes. She loves the one-on-one time...something she doesn't get a lot of lately. She has also quit taking her nap...grrrrrrrr! Oh well! The new rule is she has to stay in her room and look at books or play with her dolls for at least an hour. Today I'm letting her watch a movie, but I don't want that to be an everyday thing.

This rain is about to drive me nuts! We took Brent's advice yesterday and just let Kayleigh out to play in the rain. She loved it! She is an outdoor girl and starts to go a little nuts if she can't run around for a little while.

Sorry this is all about the kiddos...it's kind of a therapeutic thing. I have bad days when I question the wisdom of having children....they can drive me to tears on occasion. Kayleigh seems to fight me on everything and I feel incompetent most of the time with her. But I find if I focus on her progress, it helps me get passed the other stuff.

Yippie!!! We finally purchased new furniture! Here's a pic of our new couch...ours isn't red though, it's truffle(dark brown). I'm so excited! We bought the sofa, love seat, chair and ottoman. Can't wait to see what it looks like in our home!

On a sadder note....found out Saturday that my favorite clothing store, Ann Taylor, is introducing a maternity line :( This would have been awesome about a year and half ago!

Whew! What a week!

Justin had to go to San Diego for work this week and I volunteered to teach VBS at our church. Monday had me questioning the wisdom of teaching while Justin was out of town. Getting the kiddos out the door by 8:15 am was rough, and getting home at 1 pm was even rougher. We made it through the week and I have to say I am so glad I volunteered!

Before Kayleigh was born I taught Sunday school....children's ministry has been a part of my life since I was about 11. My mother directed the children's church program at our old church. My siblings and I were kinda volunteered to help out, since for some reason nobody likes to serve in this area. Don't get me started on that one.....I just can't understand why a large church, including the one we currently attend, struggles to get teachers and assistants for Sunday School. It really frustrates me!

I miss serving within the body and this week was a wonderful reminder that, even though ministry can make life a little hectic, it's so worth it! This week it was my privilege to teach 4-year olds about Jesus. Monday had me feeling a bit sorry for myself....I always seem to get the tough kids.....one with autism, one high-energy, and one very bright little girl who, like Kayleigh, tends to act up when she's bored. For some reason, I was instantly drawn to this little girl. Maybe I see myself in her or something. As far as I know, her family doesn't attend church and I'm not sure if they are believers. She asked me yesterday why we can't see God, and how do we know if he's there if we can't see him. Thought that was pretty deep for a four year old. I can't tell you how many times I got goosebumps this week! It amazes me everytime I serve how God uses these little children to teach me and strengthen my faith in him!

The sermon at church today was on James 2:14-17....Faith without works is dead, useless, of no profit to anyone. The speaker explained it like this, "Faith without works is like a car without gas". He also said if you believe something to be true, but do not act upon it, your faith in that truth is useless. In other words, what's the point of believing truth if you do not apply it to your life? It does not profit you are those around you.

Application of truth is something I have struggled with for as long as I can remember. I know so many things to be true, and yet I do not see them affecting the way I live. I feel like I'm missing some sort of bridge between knowledge and wisdom ( the application of truth). To be honest, I know what that bridge is and I know why I feel like I'm missing is. James also says that if anyone lacks wisdom, he should ask God for it believing he will receive. Therein lies the problem. I don't pray...there I said it. I just don't....I know I should...I believe God will listen and grant me wisdom...I just don't ask for it. I feel silly praying...self-conscience...like He's going to laugh at me for what I'm saying. I fight against intimacy is all corners of my life, including my relationship with God. I think I'm missing some sort of intimacy chip in my brain or something. I mean, aren't women supposed to be pros at intimacy...isn't it just something we instinctively know how to accomplish in relationships? I feel defective. And before you say it...yes, I know revealing this seems intimate....but I would never talk to someone face to face this way. I guess I just need to start praying no matter what I feel like...maybe in time I'll get over the whole feeling silly thing, until then...I'll just feel silly.

All the cousins at the Zoo! After looking at this I realized it would be totally possible to have four children with their ages (6, 3, 2, and 9 months)....scary thought!

Kayleigh has a big-girl bed now! My sister bought new bedroom furniture and gave Kayleigh her old bed. I think I am going to paint her furniture the lime green color in the comforter. Luckily I found a bed set that already matched her walls...I did not want to paint her room again!

Woo Hoo!!!! We had a potty-training breakthrough this morning! Kayleigh actually told me she had to go poo-poo, and then went on the potty! Now I know most people do not get this excited over bodily functions, but I am thrilled!

On to other subjects....

I have decided to become better informed on the goings-on in the world. Right now my only source of information is Good Morning America. This is probably not the best source, but without cable it's all I have. In the past, I have voted totally based on party affiliation and I realize this is not going to work in the future (probably didn't work in the past either). This time around I would like to research the issues at hand and make an informed decision. That being said, I need some input from you ....any suggestions on web-sites that will help make me an informed citizen. I'm not really looking for radical, but I do think knowing all sides of an issue are important, so I welcome any suggestions you have! My biggest pet peeve is people who simply accept everything they hear without looking into it for themselves. Therefore, I do not want to be one of them!

Any ideas on how to get a three-year old to pick up her toys? Here's what I've tried so far:

--putting toys left out away so she cannot play with them the rest of the day
--taking away TV
--taking away outside
--time-out, while I clean up the mess
--telling her Jesus wants her to be mommy's helper ( yeah, I know, probably not the best way, but had to give it a try)

Of course, most of these are more pushment for me, then her. I'm pretty much out of ideas here. I know she's only three, but I would think she's capable of cleaning up her toys.....especially when I am there helping her do it.