Happenings! (a.k.a. why there is a serious lack of blogging)

• Hopefully selling our house in the next month or so! We are super procrastinators and don't do any decor or landscaping until we want to sell :); it has been a busy four weeks or so. We found a new neighborhood in Frisco we really like and have a contract to build. It's exciting! Still, if our current house doesn't sell for what we want, we are totally fine with staying put. We really don't care either way.....it is a good opportunity for us to get closer to Justin's work and buy new, which is why we decided to go for it.
• End of the school semester is next week. Enough said.
• Trying out some of those boxed preschool curriculums. So far I have sampled curriculum from The Learning Box Preschool and Adventures in Learning. The Learning Box is heavy on crafts-- I'm not a big craft person, so it was a little annoying for me, but the kids loved it. Adventures in Learning is a little less craft intensive---usually one craft for the day, whereas The Learning Box would have two, sometimes three. The one big perk in my book is that the company gives you all the craft supplies and packages them by the day. Huge time-saver! And yes, I am willing to pay a little extra if it saves me the time of shopping for all those things! If I had to choose right now, I would stick with Adventures in Learning; it is less time-intensive and I would have the option of adding more to it if needed, i.e. a phonics curriculum and activity centers.

And we have a decision.....

With next fall creeping closer and closer, the schooling decision has been keeping me up at night. What is best for our kids? What is best for our family? Is there really a right and wrong answer? A couple weeks ago, after much introspection, observation and evaluation, I came to the conclusion that full-time homeschooling is just not an option for us. It would not be what is best for our children, nor what is best for our family for many reasons; the main one being the dynamic my relationship with Kayleigh. I'm not ashamed to admit we just need some space.

After I reached that conclusion, I began researching other options, two specifically: Coram Deo Academy and Liberty Christian School. I have a dear friend who works at Liberty and thought I could get a job there quite easily, allowing the kiddos to go there and me to make some money. While I liked that option, I really preferred Coram Deo, since it offered the chance for Kayleigh to "go" to school and to also homeschool part-time. To pay for Coram Deo, I would need to continue with childcare; two childcare kiddos would pay for both my kiddos' tuition and supplies, so if we wanted/needed extra money, I would need to keep more. In essence, either option would require me to work 40-50 hours a week, which is something we do not desire for me to have to do--want to do, ok, but not have to do.

So, we talked about it all a couple nights ago...at 10:30 pm, which must be the magic time for good conversations! We came to the opinion that while a private school education might be different than public school, it is not necessarily better, especially in this area where we have some pretty darn good public schools. Therefore, at least for us, the cost of private school, both monetary and family (i.e. me having to work full-time), is just not worth the different educational experience. We also believe that having involved, committed, Christ-following parents can compensate for the negative aspects of public school.

That being said.....Kayleigh will be starting Kindergarten at public school in the fall! We do plan to "afterschool" in history, science, and Latin to start out, and she'll go to the kid's program at church for Bible. I really want to find an American Sigh Language class for kids her age; she talks with her hand all the time and even makes up signs, so I'm thinking this could be an interest of hers.

I'm going to continue doing childcare until William is in school, and after that we are planning on me working part-time. This way I can have the flexibility to be a room mom, go on field trips, etc., and be the keeper of our home.

Of course, this is not a forever decision as we will be re-evaluating periodically, perhaps transferring to private school later on, but for now I feel at peace about the decision and am sleeping much better!

Isn't he just the cutest little boy you've ever seen?!

Same smile!

Some dear friends found some pics of Miss Kayleigh from Dec 2004....was she really this little? Looking at her now, it's kinda hard to believe! I love this smile!

So, I read the new this morning....I shouldn't read the news...it's not good for my blood pressure!

Two articles stand out to me:

This one--http://www.dallasnews.com/sharedcontent/dws/news/nationworld/stories/030908dnnatstemcell.1a06e392.html

It's about embryonic stem cell research. Apparently, it's not ok to clone for human reproduction, but it could be ok to clone human embryos in order to harvest their stem cells...a particular scene from the Matrix pops into my mind. My question is....why does the scientific/political community insists on exploring this possibility, when research has found adult stem cells and cord blood stem cells to be just as effective?

And this one--http://www.dallasnews.com/sharedcontent/dws/dn/education/stories/031209dnmetschoolsintrouble.3d77079.html

It's about education. DISD is looking at lengthen the school year for some of it's lowest performing schools and offering significant bonuses to bring highly-qualified teachers to those schools. Noble plan, but the sad truth is if the parents of these children refuse to be involved and make education a priority, no amount of extra time and great teaching will change anything. Lengthening the school year could actual increase the drop-out rate--who wants to go to more school when you already are apathetic about the amount of time you currently spend there? Then there's this quote:

President Barack Obama said this week that he wants kids to spend more time in school with longer school days and school years. He said the "challenges of a new century demand more time in the classroom."

I get it...in a high-tech global economy its hard to keep in front of the pack, but there is more to life than academics. If you ever get a chance, read Nation of Wimps by Hara Estroff Marano--here's a link to the article that inspired the book: http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/pto-20041112-000010.html. Why do we insist on pushing our children to be the best and the brightest? According to Marano, we feel inadequate in today's market and fear our children falling behind and having a lower standard of living than we currently experience. We want them to have a bigger house, better car, cooler job than we do. Therefore, we push, not realizing our concern for our children is actually concern for ourselves, our image, our peace of mind. Kids don't worry about this stuff, at least they don't until we tell them they should.

What I've been up to....well, besides running after kids and reading books for class....

• Rearranging the living room, which now functions as the playroom; the playroom is now only used for school purposes. This ensures all the kids are in one room, making it much easier on me to interact with/keep an eye on them!
  
• Getting all the tax info for my business together...yuck! I think I need to change my system.
  
• Jumping for joy because Coram Deo is now offering an "At Home" option for $1200 a year as opposed to $4000 a year to go to campus 2 days a week! This is an answer to prayer! I was wavering back and forth on the homeschool decision; not really wanting to send Kayleigh off to kindergarten, but feeling like I/we really couldn't homeschool. (I am not a curriculum planner, don't like it, not one bit) Well, I will gladly pay $1200 a year for curriculum, schedules, records, accountability and assistance offered by Coram Deo, at least through elementary. They only offer grades 1-8 at home, so we'll have to wait until next year to try it, but I'm optimistic!
• Attending a Pure Romance party--look it up---interesting!
• Starting William on the potty-training journey, woo hoo! Here's to a diaper free house by August! So far, he has actually done #2 at least five times on the potty, score!
• Cleaning off the picnic table outside, instead of buying a activity table for schooling.
• Making plans to attend the Homeschool Book Fair in Arlington for the first time!
• Realizing I don't spend near enough time dreaming with my hubby.
• Planning a vacation to who knows where---something tropical maybe?
• Getting excited about maybe, just maybe participating in MOPS or JOY(if it's still called that) next year, even if I have five kiddos in tow!
  

Is it something or it is nothing?

Lately, I have felt this weird desire to pack up and move somewhere, somewhere different, somewhere colder, somewhere I've never been. It's weird because I am not an adventurous person by any definition of the word, nor do I like cold weather, especially snow. Yeah, it's pretty, but boy can it be messy!

The really weird thing is Justin is feeling the same way; wanting a change, wanting an adventure, wanting to make sure we can parent ourselves without having the awesome luxury of family nearby (and by nearby means 3 miles or less). Not that we feel tied down or wish to get away from anyone here. It's hard to explain....for me, it's a desire not have lived in the same area MY WHOLE LIFE!! It's also seeing pictures of other parts of the country and thinking, "The kids would love this, heck I would love this". There's also a sense that we have it too easy with all the family we have around. I hear stories from families that have done this...they talk about how the experience brought them closer, how they had to get out of comfort zones, how they discovered themselves, etc.

Then I think....is it really about location? Or is it something deeper? Couldn't we have an adventure here, in Flowerplex? I don't know what we'll do, if anything. But it doesn't hurt to dream a little!

WARNING: Blog posting may take a serious hit due to current class requirements! This class is going to kick my tush! I need another 2 hours in a day; hopefully things will calm down once Justin starts class next week. He has class two nights a week, so that'll give me some extra time once I get the kids in bed.

The latest questions fielded from Kayleigh:

• Why is it cold sometimes and hot sometimes?
• Why does the earth go around the sun?
• What does guilty mean?
  
• Why did Jesus have to die?
• What is sin?
• Do I sin? Do you sin? Does Daddy sin?

Something tells me she coming very close to accepting Christ. She told Emma today that she could pray to Jesus and tell Him that she trusts in Him. Don't know where this is coming from....it's not like I've beefed up Bible teaching around here...I'm a little perplexed, but excited!

Not to be left out.....William's new favorite phrase is "No, I do it", shortly followed by "I need help"! At least he knows when to ask for help, unlike most men I know!

Introducing.......

Life is Learning, Learning is Life

So, now all things homeschool/preschool have their place, though I can't promise it won't seep into this blog....after all life is learning! I really set this to keep my childcare parents informed of what we are learning about from day to day, but it just might evolve into something else...who knows!

It's time to start researching school plans for next year!

What I learned this year:

• I need to stop worrying about challenging Kayleigh and have some fun with her!
• It is possible to "do school" with a toddlers in the house--that's what pack-n-plays are for! William and Gracie are old enough to entertain themselves with markers and crayons, but Abbi gets to play in the pack-n-play for about 30-45 minutes while we have preschool.
• My desire to keep Kayleigh advancing is simply that, MY desire and totally a pride thing. She's cool with just the preschool that we do and reading her books at rest time.
  
• William just might be reading by the end of next year...I truly thought he would be closer to five or even six, but he might surprise me....not that I intend to teach him to read by the end of next year, just keeping an open mind.
  
• I would love to find a couple homeschooling families to get together with on a weekly or biweekly basis. Kayleigh loves being around older kids, especially boys, plus it would give us adults some grown-up time and people to bounce ideas off of.
• I can plan curriculum, I just really don't want to need to.
• There's more, I just can't think of it right now!

With these things in mind, I think I have decided on the PLAN for next year. Notice the word "plan"; while, I intend to do the following, things beyond my control could arise to change said plan...nothing is set in stone till the purchases are made, and even then there's some wiggle room!

Right now, I am still planning to homeschool Kayleigh for kindergarten and will use My Father's World Kindergarten (MFWK) program along with Five in a Row. I struggled with the MFWK choice because the reading instruction is way below Kayleigh's current reading level, but I am realizing that while she reads at a 2nd grade level, she's not developmentally ready for 1st or 2nd grade Language Art materials, and I have noticed some gaps in certain skill sets. Plus, there are things outside of academics that I would like to have the time to focus on, like piano lessons and everyday life skills, so if next year is review for her, I'm okay with that.

As it looks right now, I will have my two kids plus two, possible three others. I need to check with one of my families to see what their plans are for next year. If it goes like I think it will, I'll have Kayleigh and Tre (both 5 by the end of Oct), and William and one other (either a 2 or 3 year old). MFWK will be perfect, since Kayleigh and Tre can do the full program together and William and the other will be able to join in on some of the activities. Not to mention, I'll be able to buy all that I need, including the Pre-K set from MFW for under $400, and that's if I buy new.

Well, this long and probably not very interesting to most of you!

Whew! What a Christmas Break we had! I felt like we go, go, go the whole time. It's nice to be back and in the same old routines again.

Lately, Kayleigh is asking many question about dying. Here's how the conversation goes...

K: Mommy, why do we die?

Me: We die because our bodies are not meant to last forever.

K: Well, when will we die? Are you going to die soon?

Me: I don't know when we will die, but God knows.

K: Will I die soon?

Me: I hope not, I would be sad if you died soon.

K: Do you want me to die?

Me: No, Kayleigh, of course I don't want you to die, it would make me so sad. But did you know that if you believe and trust in Jesus, you get to go live with Him in heaven after your body dies here on earth?

K: Grandpa is with Jesus in heaven, did he believe in Jesus?

Me: Yes, he did. Do you believe in Jesus?

K: Yep! Do you?

Me: Yes!

K: Does Daddy?

Me: Yes!

K: And William?

Me: Yes, as much as a 2 year old can.

K: And Ame and Abba? And Granny and Papa? What about Tre and Emma?

Me: I'm pretty sure they do, but you can ask them yourself the next time you see them.

I'm not exactly sure what got her started on the topic of death, but it's pretty neat to see her growing in her understanding of God. She's starting to pray on her own about things, like splinters and being afraid at night. She even evangelized to Emma this weeks...telling her that if she believes in Jesus she gets to live with Him forever in heaven. That same day, Emma got a splinter from the playset and was really upset about the prospect of having it removed. Over the break, Kayleigh got a little piece of a sticker in her foot and refused to allow us to remove it, she said she would pray to Jesus and He would heal it. The next morning, she woke up exclaiming, "Jesus healed my sticker!", and He must have because that was the last I heard about it. Well, after Emma got her splinter, Kayleigh told her about Jesus healing her foot, and right there prayed to Jesus for Emma's splinter to be healed. It was so cool sitting there watching it all happen!

I want my wife and kids back.

Bachelor weekend is great and all, but only if there's something exciting. I've just been working and that gets pretty dull without some munchkin distractions every now and then. And while I've been sleeping great in the middle of the bed, I've been colder than normal. I need my space heater cuddler.

Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday, dear Justin!
Happy Birthday to you!

or as Dave would put it....hope I get this right....

Happy Birthday, uh
Happy Birthday, uh, uh
Misery and despair, people dying everywhere.
Happy Birthday, uh
One day closer to death!

Reading this book (see below), has me asking many questions, one of which is why society tends to glorify the sacrifice women make for their families, but ignores all the sacrifices men make. There are men out there, my husband included, who choose careers that provide, instead of careers they love, give up many things they want and pretty much work their fingers to the bone in order to support their wives and children. And they do this without much griping, at least not as much as I hear from women about all they have to give up.

Not to mention, I simply cannot imagine the temptations my husband as to face on a daily basis. There are women out there who just don't care that there is a ring on his finger, in fact some might see him as a challenge because of it. That's why, despite my dread of large groups of people I don't know, I go to his office parties and make sure I speak intelligently and look pretty darn HOT! I also do my best to look decent when he comes home; he spends 40+ hours a week with professional women, I need to make a good impression when he's here :) This all probably sound very Donna Reed, but I don't care. If taking the time to keep up my appearance gives Justin one less thing to be tempted by, I'll do it!

It is kinda scary for me having my husband out there in the workplace. I'm sure there are women much more engaging and interesting than I am. Really, who wants to here about dirty diapers and teaching kids their ABCs all the time? I am working on broadening my conversational topics with the books I read and the newspaper, but my kids are my passion, so that's what I tend to talk about the most.

All this being said....I am enormously grateful to Justin for going to work everyday to make sure we have food on the table, clothes on our backs, and a roof over our heads. He values my role as a wife and mother, supports my desire to be at home with the kids and even possibly homeschool for a time, and encourages me to grow (sometimes he has to pull me kicking and screaming, but he's persistent). People ask me if getting married so young was a good idea (we were 21 and 22, and only dated 3 months before we were engaged), and while things have not always been easy, I truly believe God used and still uses Justin to protect me from making more really dumb choices. I really don't know where I would be now if I had not said "yes" eight years ago. He is my "knight in shining armor".

Over the summer I took a course on creative non-fiction, not a genre I typically read, but now I can't seem to get enough! Right now I am reading The Feminine Mistake: Are we giving up too much? by Leslie Bennetts. Interesting viewpoint, don't agree with most of her philosophy, but it's interesting. Her main premise is that leaving the workplace, for a woman, amounts to financial suicide, i.e. she is totally dependent on her man to take care of her and if he chooses to opt out or dies or is disabled, then she up a creek without a paddle; and it is not just her that suffers, she takes her kids with her.

Now I do admit some truth to what she is saying. If Justin were to go stupid and leave me, it would be really tough financially for me and the kids. I have no degree, and my skill set does not put me in line for positions with salaries high enough to support three people, at least not in the lifestyle we now enjoy. Not to mention, I have not worked outside the home since Kayleigh was born, so even getting a job might prove difficult. I really don't worry about this, or even think about it very much. Perhaps I should...but then wouldn't that be planning for my marriage to fail? For me what it comes down to is that I am not completely dependent upon Justin; I know he is human and I expect him to make mistakes (although he knows if he ever leaves me, he'll pretty much have to leave the country), therefore I look to God for our provision and I trust that if my husband goes stupid, HE will take care of me.

Another issue Bennetts brings up is the real reason many women quit the work force, and it's not necessarily because they feel a strong desire to be at home. For me the decision was twofold: on one hand, I really felt the desire to be at home with my children, but another factor was that I really just did not enjoy what I was doing. Now don't ask what I would have enjoyed doing, because honestly I don't know. I really do not have a desire to do anything other than what I am doing right now. Please don't read this as "I'm a better mother because I stay at home". I do not feel that way towards women who choose to or need to work. I understand the desire for work outside of the home. There are days I wish I had more adult interaction, days I miss an office environment and co-worker relationships; if I could work part-time outside the home and actually make money I would. I do feel isolated, like I don't really know what is going on in the world. I have a very small sphere of existence right now: home and church. It can feel confining at times and liberating at others. Heck, I get to wear sweat pants and t-shirts everyday of the week! I don't necessarily have a schedule to adhere to and I don't feel rushed or pressed for time most days. By nature, I am a home-body, so I guess that helps a little. If I was more Type-A, this life would probably drive me nuts!

Kids are starting to wake up, so I'd better go!

On my mind....

• made an "A" in my class. Yippie! Although I really feel like I did "B" work, but I'll take the "A" if the professor wants to give it. Next semester, I'm taking a course on 20th Century English Novels with a professor I know to be tough (took a summer course with him), plus 20th century literature is not my favorite, so this will not be easy! I'm more of a 18th or 19th century kinda girl. I'll probably get a head start over the break.
• The Diner has had some interesting conversations on the convergence of the old and young within the church. Got me thinking about my old church and how my senior year they started a contemporary worship service and (gasp!) the worship leader wore jeans to church! I was part of young-uns then, now I think I'm in the old guard! I don't think the issues are anything new and quite frankly the focus on how we do worship/church frustrates me a little. I understand creating a mood/environment to make worship easier, but it seems to me the mechanics are getting more focus than the purpose...that's just my opinion, feel free to disagree.
• Teaching a child to read really is easy. Slow at times and frustrating, but in the long run easier than I thought it would be.
  
• I am totally a curriculum junkie! Is there a place I can sign up to test new curriculum? That would be the perfect job for me!
  

Things I should be doing:

• Working on my final for class--it is due by midnight on Sunday, so I'll probably wait until Sunday evening to start on it. I have to write three one-page responses to novels we read this semester...it won't take me long. I know, I could get it out of the way, but I work best under pressure, so I'll wait.
• Laundry--I forgot to get the basket out of the room before I laid Abbi down for nap...oh well.
• Sleeping--between hubby snoring and Kayleigh coughing, I didn't get much rest last night.

What I am going to do instead:

• Surf the net
• Play on Facebook
• Crochet
• Spend some time in quiet solitude
  

Girly, Girly, Girly!!!!

My latest finished project! The pattern is found in the July/August issue of Crochet Today. I am so pleased with how it turned out and hopefully the new mama in line to receive it will love it too!

Here's a close up of the stitches!