Friday, December 12, 2003

Hello Everyone!

Nothing much going on in the Russell house! We finally have our tree up and decorated. I still need to add the bow and tree skirt, but that's a low priority at the moment!

Well Justin and I are officially living the American Dream (I'm being sarcastic here): two car (bought me a "mommy" car on Saturday, an Explorer), a house and a child on the way.....oh, and don't forget the dog. We have a pretty cookie-cutter life when compared to some, but I think that is the way God has designed us(as in Justin and I). I tried to live on the fringes for a while and found that was definitely not me at all! I wish I could be hip and stuff, but it's just not happening! Our lives may not be too exciting to some, but we love it! Although I think God is trying to stretch me a bit. As of yet we haven't met any of our neighbors......so, instead of waiting for them to come to me....my goal over the Christmas break is to grow some courage and knock on some doors. For those of you who know me well you know this is not something I'm too excited about. But I figure..what the heck!

There's also another area I believe the Lord is drawing me into....well actually it feels more like pushing! This is not an area where I really want to go, but I can't ignore this! For those who know my past.....had a rough three years a while back! Anyways! Two parents have approached me to disciple their sons in the same struggle I had and frankly still deal with from time to time. And although I used to say I wanted to help those who are where I was....I'm finding that my emotions tell me otherwise. Yet I know this is God leading these parents to me. And I know He desires me to get into a relationship with these young men, but everything in me wants to run. A part of me desires to help, but then I part of me also says, "Look at your life now....it's so different than it was. You don't want to be reminded of how it was over and over again." But see that is selfishness talking! I also feel completely unqualified and at a loss on how to begin with these young men. I keep saying, "I need counseling training or something to do this", but that's just me putting off what I know I should do! I'm so frustrated with myself! Anyways! Pray for me....I don't really know what to pray for....courage....faith.....a two-by-four to the head!

Okay this is long enough! Hope everyone is having a wonderful day! Only 13 days till Christmas! Better get to work on the gifts!