One of my classes this semester is Advertising Ethics, so I more than a little interested in Donald Miller has to say on the topic in his new series Commercialism and Faith.
Here's a quote:
A standard formula used in many commercials is twofold: 1. To illicit a thought in the viewer that their life is not satisfactory and then 2. To convince the viewer their life could be made satisfactory with the introduction of said product.
Not that I am equating to two, but it is interesting to me that sometimes our presentation of the Gospel is not so very different from a commercial in the sense that we try to convince someone they have a need and that need is fulfilled in Christ. This is something I struggle with; the notion that we believe in Christ because He fills some need we have; the appeal to emotions of guilt and shame, and the promise of feeling joyful and at peace. As if we only come to faith because of gain and not because we believe Christ is who He claimed to be and has done what He claims to have done. Still, I know there is more to faith than pure intellect; there must be an element of emotion, or a relationship cannot exist. This is difficult for me, as by nature I am rather wary of emotions. I do not like being manipulated by them, which is perhaps why my daughter's flair for the dramatic bothers me so much! I fight against showing them or even having them at all. My sister-in-law wears her emotions on her sleeve; there is never any doubt how she feels, whether happy, sad, excited, in love. I am somewhat envious; I wish I felt comfortable being that vulnerable, especially with my God.
Friday, March 12, 2010
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Book Review: Don't Make Me Count to Three by Ginger Plowman
I am not exactly a huge fan of Christian parenting books, though since becoming a parent I have read quite a few: Sheparding a Child's Heart; The Strong-Willed Child; How to make Children Mind without Losing Yours; Parenting with Love and Logic; and I'm sure there's a few I can't remember. The authors generally have some pretty good ideas about how to raise children, but somehow the implementation of those ideas falls somewhat short of the promised outcome in the book, usually due to my lack of perserverance. I have a really bad habit of giving up when something doesn't work right away, a habit I must strive to overcome on a daily basis. This is especially the case when it comes to parenting our children. I have "tried" so many different methods and I think this has created some frustration in both the children and myself.
What I found refreshing about Plowman's book is there are very little methods and a whole lot of scripture. A number of points stood out me:
1. Sin is serious, even in a child.
How many times have a snickered at the sin my child has committed? Sin is never funny to God and it shouldn't be funny to me. I also habitually make excuse for sinful behavior in my children: "Oh, he's just tired", or "She has a cold". Yes, it is important to be understanding, but sin is still sin even when we are tired or sick.
2. Behaviour is an outpouring of what is in the heart.
I've read this before, but I think it just sank in this time.
3. When giving a reproof always offer a way of escape.
In other words, don't stop with telling my children what they have done wrong, teach them what they could have done instead. Plowman also stresses having the child practice the way of escape after they are reproved.
4. Check your motives before you administer any discipline, whether by reproof or use of the rod.
Ugh. Why does have to come back to me? This little principle really challenges me to evaluate if my child's behaviour is truly sin or if it is just annoying and inconvienent to me.
5. If at all possible, do not embarrass your child by administering discipline in front of others.
6. Take the time to talk with your child, not only to your child. Learn to listen!
I'm a lecturer, so this is hard, but I'm working on it!
7. Finally, God's Word is sufficient for teaching, training, reproving, encouraging and I need to use it!
Overall, Plowman does a wonderful job directing the reader to scripture and providing some examples of what this all looks like in real life. However, there are some sample conversations that seems a little unrealistic, or perhaps her children are just more mature than mine. For instance, she asks her four or five year old if she is would delight in her brother's sadness over her taking a toy away and the little girl replies no she would not. Well, if you ask my five year old if causing her brother saddness makes her happy....well, let's just say her answer isn't no; but like I said, it may be more of a question of maturity and my parenting abilities, than Plowman's example.
What I found refreshing about Plowman's book is there are very little methods and a whole lot of scripture. A number of points stood out me:
1. Sin is serious, even in a child.
How many times have a snickered at the sin my child has committed? Sin is never funny to God and it shouldn't be funny to me. I also habitually make excuse for sinful behavior in my children: "Oh, he's just tired", or "She has a cold". Yes, it is important to be understanding, but sin is still sin even when we are tired or sick.
2. Behaviour is an outpouring of what is in the heart.
I've read this before, but I think it just sank in this time.
3. When giving a reproof always offer a way of escape.
In other words, don't stop with telling my children what they have done wrong, teach them what they could have done instead. Plowman also stresses having the child practice the way of escape after they are reproved.
4. Check your motives before you administer any discipline, whether by reproof or use of the rod.
Ugh. Why does have to come back to me? This little principle really challenges me to evaluate if my child's behaviour is truly sin or if it is just annoying and inconvienent to me.
5. If at all possible, do not embarrass your child by administering discipline in front of others.
6. Take the time to talk with your child, not only to your child. Learn to listen!
I'm a lecturer, so this is hard, but I'm working on it!
7. Finally, God's Word is sufficient for teaching, training, reproving, encouraging and I need to use it!
Overall, Plowman does a wonderful job directing the reader to scripture and providing some examples of what this all looks like in real life. However, there are some sample conversations that seems a little unrealistic, or perhaps her children are just more mature than mine. For instance, she asks her four or five year old if she is would delight in her brother's sadness over her taking a toy away and the little girl replies no she would not. Well, if you ask my five year old if causing her brother saddness makes her happy....well, let's just say her answer isn't no; but like I said, it may be more of a question of maturity and my parenting abilities, than Plowman's example.
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Why Homeschooling?
A few months ago I read Write These Laws on Your Children: Inside the World of Conservative Christian Homeschooling, a very interesting report by a man critical, but not completely against, homeschooling. His main concern is how homeschooling families define civic participation and duty to country. Some families homeschool because they feel the government and, by extension, the public school is hostile to their Christian values; therefore, they desire their children to spend the formative years in a more supportive environment. Some completely shelter their children from the world, filtering all things and exposing them only to those opinions and beliefs which match their own. Others homeschool so their children can experience an individualized education, learning at their own pace and in their own style. Some felt, as Christians, our civic duty is to make America a "Christian nation", typically by electing officials who makes laws out of our Christian morality. Others understand that one cannot legislate a relationship with Christ, and while they do vote based on their beliefs, they are not proponents of forcing Christian behavior on non-Christians.
Overall, I found Kuznman's report helpful and informing; some families he interviewed provided examples of what I truly want our homeschooling experience to be like and others are examples of what I want to avoid. For me, it is important for all subjects to be taught from a biblical worldview, while also allowing discussion and debate on opinions and viewpoints that do not agree with that worldview. I believe that instead of pulling out of the world, Christians need to engage the world and be able to understand and have compassion on those who think differently from us.
Of course this brings up the question: "If I believe it is important to engage the world, why am I deciding to homeschool? Wouldn't it be better for your children to be in public school, since that would be a great opportunity to engage the world?". Yes, the public school is a great place to engage the world, but do I expect my 5-year old to engage the world with much success? No, not really. This is not to say that parents who choose public school are doing their children a disservice, some children are better suited for the environment than others. Kayleigh is already beginning to believe her teacher over her parents, and that concerns me. She actually told me she thought her teacher knows more than I do! She probably does in some things, but ack! Kayleigh is also very concerned with fitting in, although her choice of dress some days causes me to question this concern :) And don't get me started on the whole boyfriend/girlfriend thing already starting Kindergarten...ugh.
So, if my goal is to somewhat control my children's exposure to the world, how will they learn to engage? This is a major concern of mine. I do not want my children to grow up niave and unable to cope outside the protective walls of our family. Therefore one of my goals while homeschooling is to be involved in a Co-Op and, perhaps, a sport not associated with the church. In searching for Co-Ops I came across Denton Classical Education Cooperative and about jumped for joy! Denton Classical is not a strictly Christian Co-Op, although most of their members are Christian, and that makes it appealing for a couple reasons: one, it allows for open discussion and debate; two, there is no denominational bent, which I see in many of the other Co-Ops around here. This area has a number of Christian Co-Ops, but frankly some of their codes of conduct are a little too strict for my taste--I really don't care if kids have more than one earring in each ear, or that boys wear their hair long, or that someone has a visible tatoo. Another reason I like Denton Classical is the most of the subjects they offer are core subjects and not just enrichment: history, science, literature, and writing are the core, with PE, art, and Spanish for enrichment. This will actually lighten my load a bit, since science and history projects will be done through the Co-Op and I will not need to spend time trying to find all the stuff to do them! As for sports, we haven't quite decided what to do on that front. We would really like to get our kids into gymnastics, but that can get rather expensive. I'm thinking of just letting them play a season is all the different sports and then seeing what they like best.
Overall, I found Kuznman's report helpful and informing; some families he interviewed provided examples of what I truly want our homeschooling experience to be like and others are examples of what I want to avoid. For me, it is important for all subjects to be taught from a biblical worldview, while also allowing discussion and debate on opinions and viewpoints that do not agree with that worldview. I believe that instead of pulling out of the world, Christians need to engage the world and be able to understand and have compassion on those who think differently from us.
Of course this brings up the question: "If I believe it is important to engage the world, why am I deciding to homeschool? Wouldn't it be better for your children to be in public school, since that would be a great opportunity to engage the world?". Yes, the public school is a great place to engage the world, but do I expect my 5-year old to engage the world with much success? No, not really. This is not to say that parents who choose public school are doing their children a disservice, some children are better suited for the environment than others. Kayleigh is already beginning to believe her teacher over her parents, and that concerns me. She actually told me she thought her teacher knows more than I do! She probably does in some things, but ack! Kayleigh is also very concerned with fitting in, although her choice of dress some days causes me to question this concern :) And don't get me started on the whole boyfriend/girlfriend thing already starting Kindergarten...ugh.
So, if my goal is to somewhat control my children's exposure to the world, how will they learn to engage? This is a major concern of mine. I do not want my children to grow up niave and unable to cope outside the protective walls of our family. Therefore one of my goals while homeschooling is to be involved in a Co-Op and, perhaps, a sport not associated with the church. In searching for Co-Ops I came across Denton Classical Education Cooperative and about jumped for joy! Denton Classical is not a strictly Christian Co-Op, although most of their members are Christian, and that makes it appealing for a couple reasons: one, it allows for open discussion and debate; two, there is no denominational bent, which I see in many of the other Co-Ops around here. This area has a number of Christian Co-Ops, but frankly some of their codes of conduct are a little too strict for my taste--I really don't care if kids have more than one earring in each ear, or that boys wear their hair long, or that someone has a visible tatoo. Another reason I like Denton Classical is the most of the subjects they offer are core subjects and not just enrichment: history, science, literature, and writing are the core, with PE, art, and Spanish for enrichment. This will actually lighten my load a bit, since science and history projects will be done through the Co-Op and I will not need to spend time trying to find all the stuff to do them! As for sports, we haven't quite decided what to do on that front. We would really like to get our kids into gymnastics, but that can get rather expensive. I'm thinking of just letting them play a season is all the different sports and then seeing what they like best.
Tuesday, March 09, 2010
Blog Musings and Big Decisions
I'm taking an Internet Marketing course this semester and one of the key components of successful sites is regular updating; apparently I'm not too concerned with this blog having success!
It is difficult to write in a public forum, especially we you must look your readers in the eye at some point. You either must be painfully honest to their face, or keep your mouth shut online! There are many things I would love to write about, but putting them out there for the world to see just isn't something I can, nor want to do. So then, I must ask myself what do I want to accomplish with this blog:
Is it mainly a place to keep family and friends updated?
Is it a place to record my thoughts and reactions to certain events?
Is it a place for creative writing?
You get my drift. Guess it could be a combination of those. Anyways...this really wasn't what I was going to post about, it just popped into my brain.
Here's what I really wanted to post about:
We are officially homeschooling next year! While this year has been a little easier with Kayleigh at school all day, I am incredibly excited about having her home come June! This is not an indictment on the schools here, nor is it a reflection on the quality of education my children would receive from them. I firmly believe one gets as much as one puts in, and even if the system is flawed, a solid education is possible within the public school system. Furthermore, I am quite grateful that many children are getting more of education than possible if public schooling did not exist.
So why am I choosing to homeschool then? My decision, which Justin fully supports though he may not agree wholeheartedly, has to do more with the environment the education takes place in. This may seem trivial, but Kayleigh is still struggling with waking up in the morning and I would love to be able to allow her to sleep until her body tells her to awake. I think my main drive to homeschool is to teach through the lens of God's Word. Not that this can only be accomplished by homeschooling; I know many parents of children in public schools that do and have done an amazing job teaching their children to think biblically. For our family I think homeschooling is the best way, at least right now and most likely through middle school depending, of course, on the kids. Lastly, there are little things that will be nice: taking a day off when the weather is beautiful or when it snows 12 inches; ability to take vacations during non-peak times (cheaper); time for some major character training (me and the kids).
I have more, but Justin is home from his work-out and needs my attention :)
It is difficult to write in a public forum, especially we you must look your readers in the eye at some point. You either must be painfully honest to their face, or keep your mouth shut online! There are many things I would love to write about, but putting them out there for the world to see just isn't something I can, nor want to do. So then, I must ask myself what do I want to accomplish with this blog:
Is it mainly a place to keep family and friends updated?
Is it a place to record my thoughts and reactions to certain events?
Is it a place for creative writing?
You get my drift. Guess it could be a combination of those. Anyways...this really wasn't what I was going to post about, it just popped into my brain.
Here's what I really wanted to post about:
We are officially homeschooling next year! While this year has been a little easier with Kayleigh at school all day, I am incredibly excited about having her home come June! This is not an indictment on the schools here, nor is it a reflection on the quality of education my children would receive from them. I firmly believe one gets as much as one puts in, and even if the system is flawed, a solid education is possible within the public school system. Furthermore, I am quite grateful that many children are getting more of education than possible if public schooling did not exist.
So why am I choosing to homeschool then? My decision, which Justin fully supports though he may not agree wholeheartedly, has to do more with the environment the education takes place in. This may seem trivial, but Kayleigh is still struggling with waking up in the morning and I would love to be able to allow her to sleep until her body tells her to awake. I think my main drive to homeschool is to teach through the lens of God's Word. Not that this can only be accomplished by homeschooling; I know many parents of children in public schools that do and have done an amazing job teaching their children to think biblically. For our family I think homeschooling is the best way, at least right now and most likely through middle school depending, of course, on the kids. Lastly, there are little things that will be nice: taking a day off when the weather is beautiful or when it snows 12 inches; ability to take vacations during non-peak times (cheaper); time for some major character training (me and the kids).
I have more, but Justin is home from his work-out and needs my attention :)
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