Any ideas on how to get a three-year old to pick up her toys? Here's what I've tried so far:
--putting toys left out away so she cannot play with them the rest of the day
--taking away TV
--taking away outside
--time-out, while I clean up the mess
--telling her Jesus wants her to be mommy's helper ( yeah, I know, probably not the best way, but had to give it a try)
Of course, most of these are more pushment for me, then her. I'm pretty much out of ideas here. I know she's only three, but I would think she's capable of cleaning up her toys.....especially when I am there helping her do it.
6 comments:
we tell judah one toy item at a time and give her very specific instructions - so say she has dress up clothes, blocks and books all out. i will tell her, "I need you to put your dress up clothes in your bin." it's one task with one instruction. Sometimes she needs more detail, like, "now pick up your cape and put it in the bin." m,once she does that, I will say, "Now I need you to put your books on your bookshelf." And then, "Put your blocks in your toy box." If it gets too hard, I jump in. For example, she can't always get her books to fit, so I'll help her arrange them. But she has to stay there and hand them to me.
If I try to just say, "You need to pick up your toys," she gets overwhelmed. A three-year old IS completely capable of picking up toys.
I also bribe her sometimes - "When we're done, you can have some chocolate milk." And if she doesn't do it, then she doesn't get any.
It's tough because I know she is capable, but she's still just going to be a kid, and I have to figure out when she's not obeying me and when she's just acting her age.
But the one task at a time thing helps. And that way if she gets distracted and starts playing, I can easily get her back on task. G'luck!
If it's really clear about where everything is supposed to go, set the timer. Make a game out of it - you play too (or at least act like you are). Can we pick up everything in one minute? Two? Are you ready? Hurry hurry! We only have one minute!! Good Luck.
I have found that I have to mix it up. At 4 1/2, I still have to be in the room with the twins when they are cleaning. I have to do what Some Chick said and give specific instructions to each girl like Sami picks up Barbies and Sara picks up the food. The game thing works sometimes too.
Another thing is I tell the girls is that they get to vacuum if they clean their room. At their age, that is SO FUN!!! I have a small vacuum for little jobs. They love that one. That used to work on the 9 and 11 year old boys but not so much anymore.
Good Luck,
Kendra
I use all of the tactics above, but with Atley we had issues with compliance. I'd say "now I need you to pick up your cape" and he'd say "No." At that point, I would physically MAKE him (like, take his hand and guide it to the cape) pick it up. Then we'd move on to the next item. Another thing we used to do when he is younger is pick up a toy everytime mama said a letter (or number) so I say "A" and he has to pick up and put away a toy. I would go slow and fast and it was a game.
Now it's a little easier, I guess, but we're trying to get away from the directed pickup (where I have to be in the room the entire time) to a less directed pickup (ie, I'm setting the timer for 10 minutes and I want you to pick up all the stuffed animals). That's not going so well right now because as I type this, Atley has literally NO TOYS in his bedroom because he refused to clean up the other day and I threatened to take his little people away. His answer: "That's okay, I don't want any toys." Well, allrighty then, I took every single toy out of his room for a week.
Sometimes...
...you can just leave 'em out. Take a break and have some lemonade with her and chat about life. Then get back to it tomorrow. The toys don't always have to be picked up.
But when they do, specifics and making sure the directions are clear is the best way to go.
Thank you everyone for these awesome tips! I think most of the problem was me setting my expectations a little high. Today is going much better, now that we are using the direction method and working on putting toys away when we are done playing with them. This will be a bit harder when the rest of the kiddos show up in August, but if I can work with Tre and Kayleigh this summer, maybe the other kiddos with pick up on it.
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