Is it something or it is nothing?
Lately, I have felt this weird desire to pack up and move somewhere, somewhere different, somewhere colder, somewhere I've never been. It's weird because I am not an adventurous person by any definition of the word, nor do I like cold weather, especially snow. Yeah, it's pretty, but boy can it be messy!
The really weird thing is Justin is feeling the same way; wanting a change, wanting an adventure, wanting to make sure we can parent ourselves without having the awesome luxury of family nearby (and by nearby means 3 miles or less). Not that we feel tied down or wish to get away from anyone here. It's hard to explain....for me, it's a desire not have lived in the same area MY WHOLE LIFE!! It's also seeing pictures of other parts of the country and thinking, "The kids would love this, heck I would love this". There's also a sense that we have it too easy with all the family we have around. I hear stories from families that have done this...they talk about how the experience brought them closer, how they had to get out of comfort zones, how they discovered themselves, etc.
Then I think....is it really about location? Or is it something deeper? Couldn't we have an adventure here, in Flowerplex? I don't know what we'll do, if anything. But it doesn't hurt to dream a little!
6 comments:
Moving away from our parents--both sets are wonderful and we love them a lot--was the best thing Tracy and I ever did for our life, marriage and family. We'd lived in the same area, too...and didn't realize how much we'd grow by moving and having that "adventure" together.
Of course, we did it for professional/educational reasons so we had a purpose beyond "just moving," but I do tell many of those I counsel before they get married that there are certainly some benefits to moves/changes, etc.
Chris and I go through that exact same desire! We have a standing offer for Chris in Madison, WI, and I so often want to just pack up and go. I think I'd like to have all of our kids first before we move away just because having babies in the winter in Madison would be excruciating compared to here. But boy my heart knows what you're going through.
we have zero family here and it does develop you as a couple and as parents it is you and only you. also we learned that friends are family and we loved moving. It was the best thing we ever did. I say go for please go somewhere better than Shreveport
My parents moved away from their family. My mom left hers in Germany when she married my dad. Dad left his in Calif. for a job. I am very close to my family because they are all I had/have. My dad isn't close to his side of the family and I meet my aunts when I was 18. My moms side I was closer to, or as close I could be because they all live in Germany. I had friends who would go to their grandparents on the weekends or for holiday's and I didn't have that and I really felt like I missed out. I can see how moving could help you grow because sometimes we can become too dependent on our family but, at this time, I wouldn't because I don't want my kids to feel the way I did, even though I would make it different because family is so important to me.
I agree that there are definitely benefits to being away from families, although I usually tell people at the beginning of their marriage that they should consider moving away for at least a few years...even if they decide want to move back when they have kids. I still think many of the same benefits apply at the stage of marriage and family you guys are in, but there is the added consideration of your kids' relationship with their grandparents.
For us, we moved to Guatemala and have very deeply missed our family. It's been really, really hard. Part of that is that we don't even live in the US anymore so there's that added stress.
But we also really enjoy "our life" here. It's been great for Jenny and I as we have had to learn to work together as a team on a deeper level. But location isn't everything. It just forces you to do some things when the grandparents are not around.
On the flip side, we really grieve that our kids don't get much influence from our parents. Sure they will grow up in another culture and speak fluent Spanish, but we have to work very hard to keep them connected to their family.
The reality is that the Lord is everywhere and where His people are, there is family to be found. We are forming really wonderful relationships, a Guatemalan family, and it's really cool. So don't be scared to move! Just make sure you and Justin force yourself to answer "Why are we moving?" before you do.
Post a Comment